Week Two Blog

I chose to focus my attention on the chapter entitled “The Psychosocial Experience of Immigration.” Oh my goodness was it eye opening. I am so disappointed that human beings have to face these troubles when a large number of them came here for a better life.

I was completely disheartened by the fact that most immigrant children who come to America are separated from their immediate family. Even if they are staying with an aunt or uncle, they are essentially strangers upon arrival. What is even worse is the conflicting emotions a child feels when they are reunited with their parents. One quote that I found so emotional was that “she was ‘my mother’s daughter and my Tante Atie’s child”(68). On one hand, the child is happy about being reunited with their family, but there is no doubt that she is going to miss the caring aunt she loved so much. I had not even thought about the possibility of change in family structure as the child is separated from the parents. A child must have so many emotions having to “meet” his or her parents again, and even more so if the parents had another child during the separation. 

I expected some of the stresses caused by immigration, such as searching for employment, enrolling children in schools, and not knowing the language. However, I was really disappointed with humanity in general to hear of the other stresses, such as problems with border control and violence in the neighborhoods. How sad is it that 36% of the immigrant children said that violence was what they disliked most about living in America. Especially for the children who escaped war-torn countries, to come to America for peace, and instead be greeted by abuse from border control. In the neighborhoods, the children do not feel safe, and there were accounts of children seeing the victim of a gunshot wound. Children should not have to witness these things. I think of how the parents must feel in that they came to America to raise their children in a better place, the land of opportunities, and instead are exposing their children to violence. 

One aspect of this chapter I found interesting was the section on “Learning the New Rules.” A 23-year old Mexican immigrant said “I became an infant again. I had to learn all over again to eat, to speak, to dress, and what was expected of me” (73). I also found it interesting how immigrant children are exposed to American culture more, and the mixed feelings parents have about this. One immigrant recollected how her mother and grandmother had a mix of pride, envy, and worry because the children could speak a language the adults could not. This must be difficult on a parent, because they probably feel obligated to be the one to teach. They want to be the ones to help their children. Instead, the children serve as a link between the parents to American culture. This also goes along with the roles families have in immigrant families, how a family leader could be “demoted.” For me, I imagine this to be like my mother if we moved to another country and her children knew the language. I know she would have a really difficult time with that, to no longer be the head of the family. 

The last thing I would like to comment on was the subject of an arranged marriage. The reading says that a girl is more comfortable with the idea of an arranged marriage if she stayed in the country of her origin. One of my close friends is a first generation immigrant, and her parents came to America shortly before she was born. They had an arranged marriage, but my friend did not find this out until she was a teenager. She had been exposed to American culture her entire life, and because of this, she was really upset by this new discovery. When telling me this story, she called it “barbaric”. Her parents were really understanding about it, and she does not have an arranged marriage. It just was a really big surprise for her. This part of the chapter just really captivated me, because I know someone who experienced this first hand.